Purgatory

End of an era and I just can't muster the energy to care.

Six and a half years in this house and we move tomorrow.

The mad scramble of packing will give way to the mad scramble to keep ahead of the movers. I need to take down the computer and disassemble the desk so they can haul it away. Don't know if the drill's charged, still have crap in the desk.

It's a mess.

I've taken three van-loads of crap over to our temporary housing - an apartment whose only quality was availability. Price maybe, but since we're renting furniture, the end result is that we are equaling our mortgage payment between structure and amenities.

Baby E gets her own room though, so I suppose that's more bang for the buck.

Zero neighborhood, though. A collection of things I'd forgotten since I'd last rented. Scrambling for parking - neighbors who are self-absorbed twenty nothings.

Shitty electric ranges - washer and dryer that scream "cheap" - lovely view of a nearby highway.

There's a pool. I'm sure we'll be using that in the next few months.

The offer on the house bounced back as a counter. This house (I'll call it Tatanka) makes the Big House look like an outhouse. Freakin' huge - dated decor. Not the home run house for either of us, but it would be a major step up in quality of life in pretty much every category.

Plus, it'd be near where we are now. We wouldn't need to abandon what we love about this neighborhood.

The seller of Tatanka has thrown in some odd conditions: they want us to plunk down more in earnest money, they want to cap how much we'd be paying per month to finance the house (weird) and they have a few items we'll need an interpreter for.

We'll see. Once we've truly jumped into this lovely apartment - it's not like we'll need to move until June. No hurry.

Oh, cell reception is actually WORSE at the apartment than it is in my current house (which is saying something - our house is like a Faraday cage).

Neighborhood walks will be a thing of the past and E will become a commuter. The kids and I get to be closer to our daily destinations, but I'm not looking forward to being out in boon-effing-nowhere.

Tomorrow, the movers will show up with containers. It's like PODs, only with moving help. It's a new wrinkle for me, but if it works, this may actually be cheaper than regular movers and fit our needs better.

I just hope we can avoid having trash bags of stuff being flung into containers at the last minute. The classic "observe our shit not being together" moment. We're both so shredded, I can hardly imagine tomorrow being worse.

But of course it will be. The snow will make moving things more difficult. The guy we hired to clear our snow did our driveway with a bobcat - and our walk with a garden spade.

Assuming people survive the walk to the driveway, they should be fine.

And it will snow tomorrow - so that should be nice.

The kids will be shuttled off to their cousin's house. My brother in law is driving down to pick them up (only family would do that - they've been such a help, I'm totally embarrassed. We've never been in much of a position to help them. Jen and her husband always seem to have their act together.)

The Boy does NOT want to go to his cousins - but every time we pick him up, he's having a total blast - so I'm sure this is just his age coming out. Baby E couldn't care one way or the other - not after the first fifteen minutes or so.

I just think The Boy is a little overwhelmed by all of this. He gets so little say in so many of his daily activities - I'm sure he's frustrated. The next few days he's going to have even less input. "Go to your cousins, we'll meet you later. Don't touch that. You can't have that, it's going to storage."

I just don't know - he's going to go to a different place with a different room, with a subset of his stuff. He won't be able to play outside (the neighborhood bites) and anyway it's cold as F---. Mom and dad are freaking out most times, and are happy to park him in front of the TV.

We need a house, we need more space, we need a neighborhood.

Mostly - we just need a break.