DVD Makers, You Suck

I certainly don't condone piracy - and I think the instant message out of the lower graphic is simplistic - but look at the second scenario and tell me you haven't been similarly annoyed:

Yeah, I put in a DVD - I have one goal in mind - to watch my movie. That's it.

In direct opposition I have three factions (and possibly more) pushing their crap in my way.

The Government who helpfully waste a set amount of time in front of every movie to tell me that I ought not to copy this movie, or I could face major punishments. Gosh, thanks.

The DVD designers who arrogantly assume that I want to watch an elaborate (and unskippable) animation (utilizing key visuals from the movie) that gradually morphs into a pulsing screen with nigh-unreadable text. Adjacent to one barely legible line of text is an ivory-on-white circle indicating the current selection.

[Helpfully, the other options are positioned in a circle with a selection sequence that ensures that cycling through them is a total guessing game. "Up goes diagonal right, but down goes left? WTF??"]

The Movie Studios who not only want to use waste my time pushing their other products, but insist that I watch them (or a part of them) each and every time I play my movie.

Honest to Pete, Here's what I want from a DVD.

As soon as its done spooling up - and I mean the very SECOND it spools up - it should go to a screen containing three elements:

1) The title of the move
2) A Menu icon (that is not selected by default)
and
3) This icon, which is selected by default:

Ideally, the DVD would delay five seconds and then play the movie automatically (Parents of small children, you know what I'm talking about).

DVD designers - I'm speaking to you here - The user has put a DVD into their player, you can safely assume that "Play" is the happy path. All other choices are Alt flows (and I mean ALL other choices - you can put the FBI warning behind the play button in the flow).

Anyone who suggests that something needs to be put in front of the play button - They are EVIL. They need to be loudly condemned in front of their peers in terms usually reserved for genocide. Perhaps then they will get the message. We don't want to see your crap. We want the movie we paid for, period. You wanna load up the DVD with crap? put all that stuff under the Menu option and let me ask for it.

(Disney? The crap you put in front of the 'play' path on your DVDs should make you ashamed to walk in public.)

I'd rant more, but I'm getting a migraine...

Gah.

(H/t Lifehacker)